It's Not the Same Thing!

It's no secret that text messaging is destroying our ability to spell, in spite of predict-a-text. Laziness is quickly masticating the English language and we're just one small swallow away from hopeless degeneration. Okay, okay, that might be a little dramatic. (Channeling Peter, Paul and Mary) Where have all the apostrophes gone? Since when are "your" and "you're" the same thing? PS--They're not the same thing.

Chat and text have created an entirely new language full of acronyms and abbreviations that never used to mean something, but hey, who cares about tradition, right?



But let's talk about one problem in particular with text messaging speak. For those who don't know, and that's everyone else besides my twin, my friend Kim, and me, there is a difference between "ya," "yeah," "yea," and "yay." Though I have other more pressing tasks I should be doing, I feel it my public duty to address this issue promptly, before you all embarrass yourselves more.

"Ya" is southern for "you" and that is the only word it replaces. So when I ask for affirmation from someone, and they reply with "ya," you can understand my confusion. Ya is not affirmative. It is the word we use when we want to say a non-committal "love you." We've all said it, we've all heard it. Love ya! Love you too, chicken butt!

So if you are trying to answer someone when they ask if you'll be at the party tonight, you really mean to say "yeah." That is the only way it works. It is the slang way of saying yes. If you were Miss Congeniality Sandra Bullock, you would be yelled at every time you used "yeah" instead of "yes." But since few of us are beauty queens, "yeah" it is. Several friends want to use it to express extreme joy for some occurrence, but they are wrong. Don't be one of them.

In a moment of sheer joy, say your friend got an A on her midterm, and you want her to know how excited you are, (and a colon-parenthesis just won't cut it)....what do you do? You say YEA! WRONG! That is scriptural for "to this extent" and that's not what you're trying to say. In fact, when will you ever need to use that word? Let me help you out...you won't. So back to the scenario of congratulation wishes for a friend...you would say "YAY!"

Yea, are we all clear? Yeah? Hey, Ya! Clear? Yeah? Yay!