So I'm almost 30...so what?

I got a call tonight from a friend wondering if she could give my number to a guy. I found it very thoughtful that she asked first. But then she said the kid and I had gone to high school together, and that ended my interest. I can't be the only one who dreads dating anyone who can remember me in those golden four years, can I? Surely others run in fear of the first date being like a high school reunion, where we relive the glory days of football state champs, and the horror visits with the vice principal.

At least we had something in common beyond our age and marriage status. Most people tell me they know someone who would be perfect for me, and when I ask how, they can only manage, "He's single, and he's older, and he's LDS." Well where have you been hiding him all these years? How quickly can we book the temple?

It's truly a Utah state-of-mind. When I summer in DC, most people suggest I will be settling down and having a family in the next few years. Though I can't tell them yes, because who can know when I'll meet someone I can tolerate for long periods of time, I think the window they've given me is reasonable. So let's adopt this new standard of appropriate marriage-age. My brother would say to that, "You know your eggs are dying, right?" Thank you, dear brother. Just one more reason you don't get invited to many family dinners.

If I check my yearbook and see this guy's picture without remembering who he is, and he hasn't seen my segment on Rachael Ray, (which would be an issue all on its own...like why he watches Rachael Ray...) then I might consider letting her give him my number. But by dang, we better have more in common than our alma mater.

Copy Editing will steal your soul

As a print major, I am required to take copy-editing, but no one told me to check my confidence at the door. That should be in the course description. I thought with my grammar nazi reputation, I would breeze right through, but the red pen all over my graded papers would tell you that didn't happen.

No one told me I would have to write headlines, but all of my writing classes told me my titles were my weakest part. So yeah, let's tackle the wonderful world of writing headlines. (Just as a side note, apparently it's a big no-no to convict someone before they are charged and tried and found guilty.... hmm....someone should have mentioned that before I lost those six points.)

The best thing to come out of the class is an appreciation for the chore it is to format a page of news, catch the grammar mistakes, the AP mistakes, and the stupidity of the writers, and generally make it appealing to the audience. My hat is off to every copy editor. I will never again make fun of you. And I promise your job is safe.

And let me take this opportunity to publicly apologize to Rebecca Bradshaw for every snide remark I made about mistakes in the Statesman. You let very few slip by for the number of words you must check. Well done. Grovel Grovel.

Put the fear of American Idol in 'em...

It used to be said "the fear of God," but after most of the shows I watch switched from their respective nights of Tues and Weds to Monday, it must be the fear of American Idol. For those who don't watch as many shows, let me give you a quick run-down of the new schedule according to me.

7 p.m. is Dancing With the Stars on ABC, which goes until 8:30 and is immediately followed by Samantha Who, a charming comedy starring Christina Applegate.

However, on the CW at 7 p.m. is Gossip Girl followed by One Tree Hill. I have seen all four seasons of OTH and am not about to stop because of a time conflict. But for Pete's sake, help a girl out.

Lest you think me finished, on Fox at 7 p.m. we have Bones, a show I am madly in love with, followed by House, which is equally riveting. Oh and don't forget Wildfire on ABCfamily at 7 p.m. It's the last season and there's a long awaited wedding coming. Can't miss it, but how do I watch it?

Some of this might be doable if I owned a TiVO, but who can afford such luxuries? Instead, I skip DWTS until it's online Tues, mostly because this season I am not voting. Last season Marc and Sabrina should have won the whole show and instead went home in week 6. It was then that I realized America is stupid and doesn't vote for most talented but instead most pathetic. (Take Sanjaya for an example.)

Sacrificing DWTS allowed me to watch Bones uninterrupted -- until next week that is. I'm not sure what I'll do. It will probably involve some letter-writing to the stations to tell them to stop being such chicken butts, and run their shows against Idol. I'd watch them, and I'm all that really matters.

Why is it all the good-looking straight men are married?

The title isn't 100 percent true, but it sure feels like it. I just got finished watching the Masters golf tournament, and the winner is a very handsome 28-year-old South African named Trevor Immelman. But as soon as he won, his gorgeous blonde wife with an equally gorgeous accent came running down to hug him and hand him his son. (The one bright spot in his being unavailable, aside from the fact that he would never love me anyway, is the bright red hair his son was sporting. Either Immelman or his wife carry the recessive gene, and I couldn't take the risk that he's the carrier.) (No offense, Nancy.)

Now, back to reality. Why can't I find a great-looking, well-spoken, financially-sound, lover of hyphenates?

Cooking is an obsession, but not a talent I have

I love to cook. I love it so much I decided to pursue an undergraduate degree in culinary arts. Unfortunately, USU cancelled its program two weeks before my decision. At the time I thought it was merely bad luck, but since then have concluded it's the Lord's way of protecting those who would have to pay to eat my creations.

Regardless of this sign or omen, whatever we think it may have been, I still cook a lot. The greatest thing to happen to cooking since Julia Child is the Internet. I can use any number of recipe site, punch in whatever ingredient I have, et voila, a delicious recipe. That is, until I get my hands on it.

Still, I thought I would put together an article about cooking classes offered here in the valley, and some of the recipe sites I use. It's clear by Food Network's growing popularity that people are more and more interested in cooking and creating. For this reason, I wrote Cooking popularity grows in Cache Valley.

If you are one who likes to cook, and wants to improve your ability, then give it a quick read. Lots to do, lots to know here in the valley.

The Masters Golf Tournament

I thought I would take this opportunity to publicly apologize for every time I called golf "men in tacky pants walking." I have a little better grasp of the skill involved and have enjoyed watching the last four hours of today's tournament. And in the spirit of complete disclosure, I will confess I am excited for tomorrow's game as well.  

Maybe it's not my new grasp of the skill, but the new young things taking the lead and setting a fashion standard as well.  Marry me, Paul Casey... 

CIL-ly USU

Let's talk about the unfairness of the CIL exams. And by that, I don't mean we shouldn't have to prove some amount of computer competence before graduating. I simply mean those of us that are Mac users should be allowed to prove our competency on Macs.

Apple is gaining substantial ground in the technological world. More and more of my friends are jumping on the Macbook bandwagon, and yes, I will admit there is a learning curve moving from PC to Mac, but there is the same learning curve from Mac to PC. In other words, each CIL exam requires me to take the first ten minutes retraining my brain to think Windows, and PC. It's a good thing they are not timed.

I only have one more CIL and then I will never again have to prove my PC competency. (Wouldn't it be nice if that statement were true?)

Oscar is a Snob

I'm pretty sure anyone who watches the string of movie award shows already knows how snobbish Oscar is...but then again, if you don't, just visit Jim Carrey's awards page on IMDB. There is a shocking lack of Oscar nominations.

The Golden Globes have been a little more willing to acknowledge his talent, especially when he branches out from his Ace Ventura style of comedy. And while the Nickelodeon Kid's Choice Awards, and the People's Choice Awards have been very rewarding, Oscar remains aloof.

It is a disgusting display of elitism, if ever I saw one. So blatant is their disdain for comedic actors, that while Kate Winslett is Academy-Award nominated for Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Carrey, her co-star is ignored. It is disappointing, and I dare say antiquated. He is not the only actor to be overlooked by those ****.

The list also includes Robin Williams, though he finally saw some appreciation for his role in Good Will Hunting, and Jennifer Garner, who played a 13-year-old girl trapped in a 30-year-old body more convincingly than most could in 13 Going on 30, (the female equivalent of Tom Hanks' role in Big, a role for which he received an Oscar nom...shocking. Hollywood has double standards? I would have never guessed.)

I specifically want to address two actors and their portrayals of characters for which most actors have no reference point and no way to research or get hands on training.

Will Ferrell plays a human raised as an Elf with such sincerity, he pulls it off. I believe all his naive comments, his heartfelt singing to his father, his gift of lingerie, and his sugar addiction. His eyes sparkle like a kid who has Christmas everyday. But did he receive some recognition for accomplishing such a daunting task? Not from bald naked man holding a sword.

Someone who can commiserate is Amy Adams, known to all tweens as "Princess-to-be Giselle" from Enchanted. She cannot take credit for her Disney-sized eyes, but she can proudly boast that she did her own singing, and she somehow created a princess pose for her hands, one that I have been unable to recreate. Brilliant choice as an actress. Again, did goldy boy even nod her way? No.

The Golden Globes gave her a nod, and I applaud them. It's true there is a separate category for comedy/musical performance, but that doesn't diminish she so genuinely pulled off playing an animated princess brought to life that even Walt Disney himself would be won over.

And frankly, both actors deserve some form of recognition for remaining that cheerful for that long. Come on Oscar, get off your high horse and take a cue from the Golden Globe Awards.

And while we're at it, the Emmys could use a little rebuffing. Why can't you learn from the Golden Globe Awards and honor some of the performances found on the CW network? You will never convince me that Lauren Graham, best known for her role as Lorelai Gilmore, didn't turn in the finest female performance of the year during her seven-season run. Never. Never ever.

You suck Emmys. You suck too Oscar. As I always said to the referees at our high school basketball games, "If you had one more eye, you'd be a cyclops."